The David Goldman case is the one that seems to have brought the most alarm to those close to me. The differences between that case and mine are many. Sean Goldman's mother technically did not abduct Sean, there was no custody agreement in place when she went to Brazil. She was still married to David when she left, and when she got to Brazil, she decided not to go back. I believe that she pretty much knew she was not going back before she left, women tend to not be THAT impulsive, but it could have been that once she got home, she was so happy, she made the decision to stay. It does not really matter what her intent was, the facts remain the same. This case is not like mine in that the mother did not have a court order that allowed her to relocate to Brazil with Sean. This case is like mine in that David made false claims in the courts that he was blocked from seeing the child, and that contact with the child had been cut off. This case is like mine in that David was able to convince the courts that his rights had been trampled and he was able to get court orders in the US court that gave him conflicting rights to what the Brazilian court had ruled. So the question is, would the court in the country where I live be bullied by the US court? Would a man who can not establish that he has made attempts to maintain contact with the child be able to swing the same support that David Goldman was able to garner? I doubt it. Would he try if he thought he could cause me any grief and upset in my life? You betcha. So, am I worried? No. On the terrorist alert colour system, I would give this a situation Yellow at best.
The case of Jean Paul Lacombe Diaz is probably the most upsetting. Does this case relate to mine? It relates in some scary ways. The father presented "court orders" from another jurisdiction (country), and was able to convince a Judge to act. The child was pulled off his school bus, crying and begging the police not to take him. He said that the father hurts him, yet the police forced the child off his bus, and handed him over to the father, who then disappeared with him to Mexico. The way that it related to me is that this child is older, the ex was a spiteful dirtbag who took the child to torture the mother, and he was able to convince a Judge to take action on a foreign court order, without notification from the court to the mother that there was a hearing on the matter. Could this happen in my case, not likely, but on the terrorist alert I give this situation a Yellow, inching towards Orange.
Finally, we come to Jill Haugen. If you are not familiar, this is the lady who took her two sons from Washington state 11 years ago, and had been living in Pennsylvania. Jill claims that she was the victim of domestic abuse, and the boys, sexual abuse, yet the court "found nothing to substantiate her claims." The father had custody after the divorce, so she took matters into her own hands and fled with the children while she had them on visitation. Apparently the children have become behaviour problems, so she decided to hand them over to the foster care system- and when she did this, authorities found a felony arrest warrant for her from Washington for custodial interference. She is currently in jail awaiting extradition. The children have been returned to their father in Washington. This case relates to mine in one way, the felony warrant; although, the warrant is different, its existence is what upsets and worries everyone close to me.
These stories are only a recent flurry of activity. There are situations like this every day that do not make the headlines.
Of course it worries me that all of the coverage that these stories has raised might awaken what appears to be a sleeping dragon. I can not let the fear of what could happen paralyze me. My child is 16 years old now, but I feel no unrealistic sense of security in his age. What I do feel secure in is the court system where I live, and the court orders that I have that protect us. I feel that even if he came here with his US court orders, given the court orders here, and the age of the child involved, he likely would not get anywhere. I further do not believe that he has the testicular fortitude to attempt to exact an "abduction" scenario where he reclaims physical custody. Honestly, I believe that the sport of harassing me with court action has lost its appeal now that our child is practically grown. I also believe that now that he does not have to pay support any more (yes, a Judge ordered him to cease support payments), he does not want to take any chances of involving himself as this might mean support payments and *gulp* arrearage for the past 6 years that he has not paid. He is probably more afraid of me than I am of him.
What does the future hold? Good stuff as far as I am concerned. I have written a book about my experience, that I hope garners some attention.
In 2010, I become a citizen of this country, and I believe this will solve several issues that plague my life currently. Fortunately, and unfortunately, my child continues to get older, and bigger (he's almost
6 feet tall now), and in the not so distant future, he will be 18 and no one, not even his biological father waving a court order, can touch him.
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